Change Is Not Necessarily Bad, Right?

I will admit, in the last 5 weeks I have made some pretty significant changes in my life.  Just day before yesterday I posted that I was considering chopping my long hair off. 

1. I live in the mouth of Hell.  It's always up in a bun or ponytail anyway because it's too damn hot to do anything else with it.
2. It's very long, but I'll cop to not really taking proper care of it.  It's straggly, ends are split terrible, it's not very healthy.  A good chop, of 6 or 7 inches would actually really do wonders for it.

A friend of mine commented on that particular Facebook verbal spew of mine about how much change I'd been going through and did I really want to do this (chop my hair).  And that made me really think about things. 

5 weeks ago today, I was rocked to my core, by the sudden stunning loss of a part of my soul.  Change number 1 - and the biggest and certainly most significant change in my life.  I didn't choose that change, it choose me (take it back, please).  Her death was ultimately ruled as sudden onset acute liver failure.  She didn't live the healthiest life (over weight, drank wine, nearly no exercise) and paid the ultimate price for it.  I firmly believe that this liver failure might have happened to her no matter what her physical condition was, but it made me take a look at her overall health, and my own health. 

Change number 2 - I changed the way I eat.  I was toying with Atkins, going total no carb, and decided to not do that strictly, but follow the philosophy of very little carbs, lots and lots of protein and cutting out as much processed sugar as I can (which is hard because holy crap, processed sugar is in EVERYTHING).  I am a 20 year veteran of weight loss surgery, so for me, losing weight is fairly easy.  I'm a bit heavier than I'd like to be right now because despite the surgery, I tend to eat my feelings and there have been a LOT OF FEELINGS lately.  Being a long time vet of the procedure, I've also figured out what I can eat that comforts me and ultimately is full of empty calories (mmmm, ice cream, peanut butter cups, chips and dip, pretty much anything not good for you).  I need to knock that crap off and get myself healthy again.  Lose some weight, maybe gain a bit of muscle.  Maybe it will help my poor deranged arthritic knee (seriously, doctor called it a 'deranged patella') as well.  This is a positive change.  I even got the fiancé to try to play along with me. 

Change number 3 - I GAVE UP DIET COKE.  OMFG.  I'm 7 days in to no Diet Coke now.  Not a drop.  I walk past the machine at work and I literally salivate.  I want one so bad.  However, even though it's diet soda and not full sugar, it's still incredibly bad for you.  So much sodium, so many chemicals.  Catherine always fussed at me about how much I drank.  I could smash a 12 pack in 2 days...and that's during the week, when I'm at work all day.  That means, in a period of less than 8 total hours, I'd down 12 sodas.  That is not good for you!!  I've switched to drinking water and tea (hot and iced) exclusively.  After a week, I guess I feel a little better?  I know I'm saving a shit pile of money.  Diet Coke 12 packs are running damn near $5 each now. 

Change number 4 - I signed up for grad school. 

Crap on a cracker.  Next 11 months of my life.



This is something that I wanted to do, and had actually started the process of doing a few years ago.  I got hung up because the dickhole university (rhymes with University of Shmoenix) I got my bachelor's degree from refused to release my transcript to the new university, claiming I owed them a pile of money for some class.  This was 100% untrue because my company paid my entire bill for the undergrad program - every damn penny.  I didn't owe them a dime.  It took me 2 years to get that all straightened out.  Once that was all sorted, I had my grandbaby living with me and just didn't have time.  She was very into education and was so encouraging of me for wanting to go do this.  So, I'm doing it.  I begin class on Monday July 20 (SIX DAYS). 

Change 5 - I want to cut my hair. 

So, here we are.  Now that I've listed them out, they are very substantial (except the hair thing, that's just because I'm tired of it and it's HOT).  However, I feel they are all positive for me and my family.  None of these changes are "start using heroin" or "rob convenience stores for a living".  These are changes designed to improve my quality of life.  Catherine died at 40 years old.  FORTY.  If there is anything I can do now, any changes I can make now, to help me live longer for my children, my grandchild, my fiancé, my friends, I'm all down to do it. 

So, how about this cut?