The Unbelieveable Suckfest That is 2015 Just Keeps On Rolling

Since my last post, I've lost another dear friend to Heaven and have had some very private and fairly substantial issues with one of my kids. 

Seriously.  This year needs to quit.  Just stop already.  I'm over it. 

My sweet friend Jill, who I met online and had the absolute honor to meet in person, suddenly passed away several weeks ago.  Turns out it was congestive heart failure.  Her sister (they lived together as Jill was helping her sister raise her kids) came home from work to find Jill slumped over her desk in her room. 

Again, like Catherine, rather than dwell on her death, I want to dwell on her LIFE.  Jill was a grammar nazi.  She was a writer.  She was lover of great classic fiction.  She had completed her bachelors degree and had moved on to her Masters program in romantic literature (I think....).  She was writing a childrens book, and editing a book for our friend Cher.  (FYI, Cher was asked to finish the book Jill had started - she was verklempt and honored at being asked to do this)  She was absolutely obsessed in love with her niece and twin nephews, spoiling them rotten - but being mean Auntie Sue when she needed to.  She was a quiet person, preferring to sit back and observe everyone around her.  She was smart, she was witty.  She was hands down hilarious.  I miss her terribly. 

In a weeks long group discussion thread on Facebook Messenger with all the people who love Jill (affectionately referred to as The Family), suddenly, one of the group came up with many, many photos of Jill from a phenomenal house party in Kentucky 6 years ago.  It was seriously the best party I have ever been to.  As I was scrolling through the photos, I was stopped cold in my tracks, wind knocked out of me. 

That is Jill in blue behind me, I have my hand on Catherine's shoulder, and to my right is Laci (yes, my shirt says "Loud Bitch" - and yes, there is story behind that).   

In this one picture are two of my very dear friends, both of whom passed away this summer/fall, both of whom were way too young (in their 40s).  I still can't even wrap my brain around it, I really can't.  Since June, loss experienced by me or my friends/fam (framily) numbers 7.  SEVEN.  This number wouldn't be shocking if I was, say, 75 years old.  I'm not.  I'm 45 years old.

So, since this year has truly and thoroughly sucked for so many people, I created a Facebook event - a virtual party for New Years Eve, so we can all get together, chat, laugh, and try like hell to create some positive mojo for 2016 as we give 2015 a giant and collective middle finger. 

We have all had it with your bullshit 2015. 
We are over it.   Bye Felicia!

 

Sour Cream Enchilada Sauce

I love Mexican food.  No.  That is not entirely accurate.  I adore it.  I'm obsessed with it.  I would eat it 3 meals a day, 7 days a week for the rest of my life without hesitation. 

Here in south east Texas, you can throw a rock and hit at least 3 or 4 good quality (and cheap) Mexican food restaurants.  I didn't realize that this isn't a thing everywhere, until I left here in 2005.  I spent 7 years away from Houston and never found even one decent place (St. Louis - your Mexican food is just embarrassing and shameful and Alabama?  I suppose I should not have had high expectations there LOL).  The VERY first thing I did when Scott and I moved back was take him to eat REAL tex-mex food.  He spent his whole life in Topeka, KS.  Again, like St. Louis and Alabama...nope.  He was incredibly impressed, as I knew he would be. 

I make it at home as often as possible.  Tacos, burritos, enchiladas, homemade fresh salsa (which, I'll have to find my recipe and link ya to it), spanish rice, lime/cilantro rice (Chipotle whaaaaat?), ranchero sauce, huevos rancheros (I'm a huge fan of that!).  About the only thing I don't mess with is tamales and home made tortillas.  Making tamales and tortillas requires skill, lots of practice and a little bit of magic or witchcraft.  I also make a creamy avocado sauce that is served at my favorite place down here on the table with the chips and salsa (omg, avocados, Mexican creama, sour cream, cilantro - so so good). 

I found a new sauce a few weeks ago.  I've always seen menu items of enchiladas with a sour cream sauce.  Well.  I like sour cream.  I like sauce.  This can't be bad!  And OMG it's not.  It's SUPER simple, and incredibly tasty.  We had tacos and tostadas for dinner last night and I made this sauce to go on top.  I had plenty left over, so I heated some up and poured it on my eggs this morning for breakfast - TO DIE FOR. 

The sauce is simple if you can make a roux.  And please, don't say you can't.  You CAN.  I promise.  The trick is that when you have the fat (butter) and flour in the pan you CANNOT WALK AWAY.  You cannot take your eyes off of it.  Even for a moment. 

This sauce takes about 5 minutes, start to finish.  Please, mis-en-place your ingredients first.  The sauce cooks very fast and given that you can't walk away from the roux, you can't put your spoon down to go get the next thing.  Very important to get everything out, measured and ready to go. 

Sour Cream Sauce
1/4 cup butter (please, for the love of Paula Deen, USE REAL BUTTER)
1/4 cup flour
15 oz of chicken stock (I didn't have stock so I used bullion last night - not ideal but in a pinch it works)
1 cup of sour cream
1 can of chopped diced green chilies

Heat your butter in a pan (I use a sauce pot, because you will add a bit of liquid) over medium heat.  Once melted, pour in the flour and get your wooden spoon.  This is where the constant stirring starts.  Never stop stirring for a moment.  Incorporate the flour completely and cook while stirring for about 1 to 2 minutes.  As you cook it, the roux will get darker in color.  You need to stop when its straw colored.  You are cooking it JUST long enough to cook the raw flavor out of it (which omg, please do not forget that...raw flour is VILE). 

Once you have the desire roux color, add all the chicken stock at once.  Switch from wooden spoon to whisk and stir.  Turn your heat up to hi and bring it to a boil.  Once it boils, it will be as thick as it will get and you can stop the cooking.  Remove from the heat. 

Add the sour cream and whisk to thoroughly combine.  Add the diced chilies and stir (with a spoon - the chilies just get stuck in the whisk if you use that......at least that's what I've heard.  *snort*).

That is IT.  Seriously.  So simple.  5 minutes.  We drizzled it over our tacos/tostadas last night, I poured some over my scrambled eggs this morning.  Use it to dress a pan of chicken enchiladas.  The possibilities might be endless with this tasty little sauce. 

Mangia!  Mangia!

A Hard Birthday

Today is Catherine's 41st birthday.  She isn't here to celebrate it, but I know what she would have done. 

Because she was a Pretty Pretty Princess, she didn't have a birthDAY.  She had a birthMONTH.  She celebrated the entire month of October every year I knew her.  She would spend each weekend of the month going out with friends to celebrate, usually went out to a super nice, fancy dinner actually ON her birthday with her husband and typically used this month to be financially irresponsible, because it was her "birthday month".  LOL  She never shied away from a birthday, never got weird because she was getting older.  Her and I had had many conversations about our age.  It is at this age (I'm 5 years older than her - I'll be 46 in December) that we were both most comfortable in our skin.  In your 20's, you are trying to figure out what/who you are.  In your 30's you have a pretty good idea and maybe even a plan on how to get to where you want.  We both felt that at this age we are now, we had finally truly realized what we planned for our lives in our 20's and 30's. 

You get to an age where you stop trying to impress others and are really focused on being the best you that you can be.  It is also about this same age where you begin to give absolutely zero fucks about what other people think of you and refuse to allow others impression of you and potential negativity affect you.  We were there. 

Were we both insecure?  Sure, what human isn't?  Did we allow the insecurities to ruin or control our lives?  HELL NO.  We held our heads high, locked our arms and skipped down the street (good GOD, we actually did that one night after too many glasses of wine at dinner and a 4 block walk back to her apartment LOL) with our heads held high.  Screw the haters.

These past 4 months without her have been so strange, so surreal.  It doesn't help that in my little circle of framily folks, there has been SO. MUCH. DEATH. since June, with the most recent one being the death of a friends 21 year old son just last week.  2015 is a crappy year.  Super, super crappy year.  So bad that I believe I AM going to organize a virtual party, maybe a Google hangout, something, so that we can all collectively give 2015 the finger as it goes out the door and hope like hell that 2016 is gentler and kinder. 

So, wherever you are, stop a moment and think of Catherine.  Wish her a happy birthday.  She can hear you. 

 Happy birthday in Heaven beautiful.  I miss you every single day, but I keep a small piece of you in my heart with me always. 

12 Fridays Left!

I know it's only October.  It's firmly Halloween season here in the US.  And I love it, I really do! 

But, Christmas is coming.  And it will be here before we know it.  This has left me with a small conundrum and I think I have a great and fun solution. 

Scott and I are alone this year for Christmas.  The kid and the grandbaby lovey shmoopie Most Perfect Child In The World are not going to be here this year.  There is nothing sadder to me than a Christmas tree all decorated and beautiful, with nothing beneath it.  I imagine that is because for so many years, I've had a tree that was full of presents for kids.  So, I can't fathom having a Christmas tree that has nothing under it.  However, Scott and I are grown ups, and truly our Christmas gift to each other this year is the cruise we are taking in April, so we won't have anything under the tree.

Or will we??

I suggested, and I TOTALLY want to do, this:  I want him and I to go shopping at the dollar store or a store we have here called Five Below - in which everything is under $5.  It will be cheap and it will fill the tree with presents!  I also firmly believe it will also be hysterical.  How much weird crap can we find for under $5 each thing?  The more I think about it, the more I want to do it.  Maybe we'll make it a competition - who can find the weirdest thing?  Haaaaa.

I had thought about taking some empty boxes and just wrapping them and putting them under the tree because that's better than nothing right?  The more I thought about that, the more I realized that no, it was not better than nothing.  It was far sadder than a tree with no presents. 

Now, I'm excited.  It's just 12 more Fridays until Christmas! 

Here Fishy, Fishy!

I am 1000% NOT a fan of fish.  Actually, if it lives in the water, I hate it.  Shrimp, seafood, fresh water fish, oysters, scallops, etc.  **shudder**  So.  So.  Gross.  And I hate that about myself because seafood is so incredibly healthy and good for you.  Very low in calories, very high in protein, fish oils, generally things good for your body.

Despite my (very strong) feelings regarding fish/seafood, Scott does NOT hate it.  In fact, he loves seafood a great deal.  He just never gets it at home because I don't cook it.  I am a good cook and I can cook anything, given a recipe (I can follow instructions pretty well), however, I tend to cook and taste.  It tells me if what I'm making tastes right, or needs more seasoning, or some additional flavor.  True story - I never ever sit down and eat Thanksgiving dinner.  That is because by the time the dinner is placed on the table, I've eaten a full meal while cooking it.  So, since I don't like fish/seafood, and I taste while I cook, I just don't cook it.

Today is Scott's birthday.  He was originally supposed to work kind of late tonight, so I decided to make him a birthday dinner last night.  I decided to make seafood for him.  Oy.  I was nervous!  I ended up making grilled salmon with a compound lemon, garlic, basil butter, roasted asparagus tips and a fresh panzanella salad.  It all came out great - according to him.  :)  I figured I better write it down somewhere so I can do it again!!  :)

SALMON

Compound Butter
4 tbsp butter, room temperature
Zest and juice from one lemon
1 tbsp minced garlic
5 to 6 basil leaves, julienned 
Completely combine all the above ingredients in a small bowl.

Compound butter is a magical thing.  Don't want lemon?  Use oranges.  Don't like basil, use oregano.  The key is that you can use ANY flavor profile when making compound butters.  That above is just what I used (because I have a basil plant in my backyard and have plenty on hand at all times). 

I grilled the fish.  Fish sticks to the grill like crazy.  Try this tip to not only keep it from sticking, but infuse a ton of flavor into your fish as well.  Lay your fish on a bed of sliced citrus fruit.  In this case, because I believe lemon goes best with fish, and I had it in my butter, I used lemons.  You could use oranges (and make your compound butter with oranges) if that is your thing. 

I got a very large salmon filet with the skin on.  I cut it into 3 filets (and froze one) and dried them off a bit.  I liberally covered the non-skin side of the fish with the compound butter. 

I turned just one burner of my grill on so that I could cook this fish on an indirect heat.  That is important.  You do not want flames touching this delicate meat.  Medium high heat.  Line the grill with your lemon slices (and the smell from them instantly beginning to sizzle is amazing!), then lay your filets on top of the lemon slices, skin side down (butter side up) and shut the lid.  Do NOT flip this fish.  No need.  Basically, doing it this way, you are using your grill like an oven.  In my case, it took about 30 minutes to get the fish cooked through.  That time will be less or more depending on the thickness of your filets.

PANZANELLA

Panzanella is an old world peasant dish.  It's bread salad, originating in Italy, with references to it dating back to the 1500s!  People were not wasteful back then, as we are now.  Every single thing was used.  This dish began as a way for the people back then to use up their day old bread and whatever vegetables were laying about.  Traditionally, this salad must include at least the bread and tomatoes to be considered panzanella.  After that, the ingredients are up to you!  I did a fairly simple one last night - not too crazy.

3 Tbsp olive oil
1 tsp kosher salt
1 loaf of Italian bread (I bought one from the bakery and only used about 2/3 of it)
2 ripe tomatoes, diced
1 cucumber, seeded and diced
1/2 red onion, sliced thinly
1 red bell pepper, diced
1 yellow bell pepper, diced

Vinegrette
1 tsp Dijon mustard
3 Tbsp white wine vinegar
1 Tbsp minced garlic
1/2 cup olive oil (use good olive oil here, this isn't going to be cooked, you want a flavorful oil)
Salt and Pepper to taste

Cut the bread into 1 inch cubes.  Warm the 3 Tbsp of olive oil in a pan.  Add the bread and kosher salt to the pan and toss to coat in the oil.  At a medium low temperature, brown the bread, tossing frequently, for about 10 minutes (you may need to add more oil - eye ball it).  Remove from heat.

Make the vinegrette by adding all ingredients except the 1/2 cup olive oil to a bowl.  Combine with a whisk.  Continue whisking while slowly drizzling the olive oil in, until all oil is incorporated and fully combined.

In a large bowl, add all the vegetables, add the bread and toss with the vinegrette.  It's as simple as that.  You can also add things like capers, good olives (like kalamata), anchovies (if you are into that sort of thing....ewww) and fresh herbs.  Due to the above mentioned condition of too much basil at my house, this salad got some julienned basil tossed in for good measure.

You can serve right away, but wow.  Let it sit for 30 minutes and get all the flavors combined?  To.  Die.  For.  It's BREAD SALAD.  How can it possibly be bad???

For the asparagus tips, I simply trimmed the woody part off, coated the tips in olive oil and a little salt and pepper, and tossed them a foil lined sheet pan under the broiler for 8 to 10 minutes.  Pull them out, squeeze a little fresh lemon over them, add a bit of Parmesan cheese and voila!  Done.

It was a wild success, according to him.  He ate every single bite on his plate.  He also thanked me profusely for making him fish, since he knows I can't stand it.

I love that man to pieces.  <3 <3 <3

Best Soup EVER

Here is something you need to know about me right now, right up front. 

I'm a soup-a-holic.  A true soup fan.  I love just about all kinds of soup, except cold soups.  Those are weird.  Stop it.  But, a warm hearty soup, or a thin light soup, I love them all.  I also eat soup year round.  It doesn't have to be cold for me to have and enjoy soup.  Mostly because where I live, we never really get "cold".  But, also because hey, I just really like soup.

My very favorite soup of all time?  Tomato Florentine from Zio's Italian restaurant.  Ahhhh, it is so good.  It is creamy and full of rich tomato flavor and has DILL in it.  That makes this a really unique soup.  It's not overwhelming, but its there in the background, just hanging out, mixing with everything else.  It's so incredibly good.  I've been eating this soup in the restaurant for at least 10 or 12 years now, and I've also been searching for a copy cat for this recipe for just as long.  I had given up ever finding one.

And then, I did.   

I stumbled across this recipe at Food.com and went ahead and printed it.  I've been so disappointed over the years, I didn't want to get my hopes up.  I finally grabbed what I needed to make the soup  (which is surprisingly few things that I didn't already have on hand) and set out to make it, assuming it would be just for me.  Scott hates dill.  HATES dill.  Well, I think what we discovered is that Scott hates dill pickles, but dill itself is okay (I've always wondered, because he can drink Ranch dressing by the bucket....which is full of dill). 

It's a process, that's for sure.  It's not hard, just a lot of steps.  I also HIGHLY recommend you mise-en-place before you begin.  It is always a good idea, but for this, it is really helpful.  I got through the first half, was letting it simmer and I kept smelling it.  It certainly smelled correct.  I kept on with the steps and finally scooped a bowl full of the soup, topped with some fresh grated Parmesan and nervously took my first bite. 

It is EXACTLY like the soup they serve at Zio's.  I have found it.  My decade long search is over.  This recipe is an exact copy cat of theirs.  Ooooh, happy day!  And, because it smelled good and curiosity finally got the better of him, Scott had a bowl.  And damn near picked it up to lick it clean.  He really enjoyed it!   (I'm pretty sure he hates the VINEGAR in the dill pickles, not the dill now that I've seen him scarf down a bowl of soup with lots of dill in it)

If you are interested, here is the recipe I used (linked above too).  Enjoy!!!!!!

FYI - this is the recipe word for word from Food.com - and I followed it exactly this time to see if it is an exact copy (it is) - but next time I'd likely use real chicken stock instead of bouillon but the rest is spot on. 

Oh, one quick tip - if you aren't used to making a roux....when the recipe says to let it get to a certain color, please do.  Common mistake is to not cook it long enough, then your roux will taste like raw flour (which is disgusting) and it will make your whole pot of soup taste like raw flour (yuck).

Tomato Florentine Soup (like Zio's)

• 3 tbsp flour
• 3 tbsp butter
• 3/4 Cup diced onion
• 2 tbsp butter
• 2 tbsp fresh garlic (I used the jarred, already minced kind)
• 3 chicken boullion cubes
• 1 cup boiling water
• 1 28 oz can of crushed tomatoes (you could use diced, but then you'll have to blend it)
• 1 tbsp ketchup
• 3/4 cup vegetable juice
• 1/2 tbsp dried basil
• 2 tbsp dried dill
• 1/4 tsp hot pepper sauce (I used Frank's - I put that shit on everything! LOL)
• 1/2 tsp sugar
• 1/4 tsp black pepper
• 2 tbsp dry white wine
• 2 cups heavy cream (oooh yeeeeaaah baby!)
• 1/2 cup fresh spinach, julianned

Process:

Make the roux and set aside to cool.  Heat 3 tbsp butter in a heavy sauce pan over medium heat until bubbling.  Whisk in flour and cook until the color of straw.  DO NOT WALK AWAY and DO NOT STOP WHISKING.  This is the biggest mistakes people make when trying to make a roux.  It can burn in the blink of an eye.  Once you have the desired color, remove from heat and set aside to cool. 

Saute the onions in 2 tbsp butter until softened and translucent (do NOT hurry this step or you'll get burnt onions instead of caramelized - be patient).  Add the garlic and saute for 1 to 2 minutes.  Don't go too long once you add the garlic.  Garlic burns very easily.  Pour this onion/garlic mixture into a food processor and blend until fully pureed. 

Dissolve 3 chicken bouillon cubes in 1 cup boiling water. 

In a dutch oven or soup pot, heat tomatoes, ketchup, vegetable juice and chicken stock over low heat.  Once heated, add purred onion mixture, basil, dill, hot pepper sauce, sugar, black pepper and wine.  Stir to fully combine and simmer for 15 minutes. 

Whisk in your cooked roux and simmer an additional 30 minutes. 

Whisk in your heavy cream, stir in your spinach and serve! 

Serve with Parmesan, extra bits of spinach, Zio's adds croutons to theirs (I never eat them).  I simply added Parm to the top of ours and made Scott a grilled cheese sandwich to go with it.  Yummmo!

Zero!

Haven't blogged in a while.  Just haven't felt the mojo to do it.  Nothing's been wrong at all, just not into blogging for a few weeks.  I've been busy crocheting, testing out new recipes (my poor guinea pig at home - oh wait - he's not suffering!!!) and playing on my computer.  That's about it.  That and work.  Too much work.

Scott is now firmly working in his new position as the lead person in his department.  I'm so incredibly proud of him for all the work he's put into getting this position.  Plus, the extra money isn't shabby.  Unfortunately, because this new position is in a brand new store (it just opened Wednesday of this week), he's working crazy hours.  I mean, lots of money, but little time to visit with him.  Boo.  Not a fan of that part.

To pass the time while home alone, I've been crocheting a lot.  Working up Christmas gifts and trying to finish some baby blankets I'm working on.  My silly self posted a picture of a little lovey (that is a small crochet blanket with a stuffed animal attached to it) patterned after Zero the dog from Nightmare Before Christmas.  See him?  He actually LOOKS like a little blanket lovey, so he's kind of perfect for this kind of project.  I tagged my daughter because she is obsessed with the movie (has been her whole life) and asked, kind of cheekily, if she wanted one (she immediately said yes.  duh.) and I was not prepared for the messages from several friends asking for one themselves!  I love it!!!!  I made the first one, and it is bound for my dear friend Cher in Florida, intended to be a birthday gift for her granddaughter.  I'm so pleased to be able to do it for her!  Here is my final product: 

He took two days, but only because I didn't have any poly-fil to stuff his little nose and head.  So quick and easy to do.  I really enjoyed making him.  I have to make 2 more of them, right away.  I love to crochet and I love to do it for people.  Like any other craft, I do it because A) I enjoy it and B) I enjoy seeing the joy and happy it brings to other people.  Plus, it keeps my hands busy.  I've seen the movie Idle Hands (if you haven't, please stop what you are doing and go watch it immediately.  it's brilliant comedy/horror with a great young cast) and I know what happens when you don't keep your hands busy.  Ha! 

My next project is a bit daunting but I'm ready to try harder things in crochet.  I only began doing this 4 years ago after boredom, a yarn ball, a hook and Youtube all collided one evening.  I've taught myself everything, including how to read patterns and charts (which was NOT easy, let me tell you...it's like learning another language).  So, this will challenge me, which I love.  But seriously, how unbelievably gorgeous is this blanket??? 

This is a test pattern that will shortly become a pay for pattern (not downloadable for free) but this designers patterns are usually not more than $7 or $8 each, so they are really a bargain and they are just visually stunning.  If you want to see more of his work, including some free patterns as well as others in a similar vein to this one, visit his Ravelry page Made of Change.  His patterns are all very unique in that there is not a single row that is the same as another one.  They are all different, with different stitch techniques.  These are good to try new stitches out, plus, just look at it.  Gorgeous.  My furniture in the living room is blue, so I think I shall do this one blue like in the photo. 

On that note, I'm so glad it's Friday.  So, so glad.  LOL  Ready for the weekend, which with any luck will involve a whole lot of me not doing anything.